When I left for Wisconsin, I hoped to get a perspective on where I should go next with my career.
I hoped to have luxurious hours to sit in a cafe with my notebook and pen, detailing my strengths and weaknesses, emerging with a sound plan to get out of the overwhelmed soul-despair I’ve found myself in since last January.
I hoped to find salvation.
Instead, I spent vacation elbows-deep in diapers, kids, family, catching up, eating, working, eating, working and putting kids into their respective car seats.
It was no different than my regular life.
And although that was frustrating, it was a good reminder.
Life goes on.
Changes have to be made incrementally, tucked in the minutes of free time I can now muster.
Big sweeping changes must be internal.
Turning the dial in my chest to point to me.
That said, ten days in the Upper Midwest did clear a little space for me.
I’m excited to quit caring about the latest blogging drama of the day.
I’m excited to refuse to put up a media kit.
I’m excited to stop viewing every event with my family as something that must be documented and turned to eyeballs.
I’m excited to pick up brushes and pencils to share my thoughts, and turn that dial away from “MUST MAKE MONEY LIKE THAT LADY THERE…” back around to,
“This is my place to share my life.”
If that doesn’t include monetizable content, that’s awesome.
Monetizable content just stresses me out.
If that doesn’t fling my career to EXPERT or SUPERSTAR or MAVEN, that’s just fine.
If that’s not participating in “THE SOCIAL MEDIA CONVERSATION,” that’s all right by me.