3 November, 2010  |   8 Comments

Future You is a deserving lady

Red leaf

I’d like to think of myself as the kind of lady who takes good care of herself.
But as referenced in my martyr post, I haven’t been doing too good a job of that.

Not enough sleep,
Not enough vegetables,
Not enough exercise.

Too much mean self-talk,
Too much judgment,
Too much apologizing.

And it gets me all pinchy and
weepy and

Since better self-care was one of my New Year’s resolvations, I’ve had to work fast.

Here’s how I’m applying myself:
See, I think it’s really great to do nice things for other people.
You do too, I can tell.

I like to surprise folks,
Get them little gifts,
Be thoughtful.

But I can’t seem to apply that thinking to me.

So I started thinking of Future Helen Jane as another lady, separate from me.
A nice lady.
A deserving lady.
Future Helen Jane is just trying her hardest.

Wouldn’t it be nice to do something for Future Helen Jane right now?

And in this way, exercise dvds get completed,
Wrinkle cream gets applied,
Self-talk turns to kindness.

What’s something nice you can do for Future You today?

Future You is a nice lady.
Future You is a deserving lady.
I can tell that Future You is just trying her hardest.

What can you do for Future You today?

8 thoughts on “Future You is a deserving lady

  1. 1
    Emily says:

    Yay! I am glad you are thinking of it that way. Doing nice things for myself isn’t one of my issues (I am always getting myself presents, because life is short!) but I know some people a real problem with it. I am going to send this to them! xo

  2. 2
    Emily says:

    Some people HAVE a real problem with that. I ate too much sugar and cannot type!

  3. 3
  4. 4
    amanda says:

    This kind of makes me weepy. Why are we so willing to do things for other people, and not ourselves? Why do we have to picture ourselves as another person – a future version – before we are willing to do nice things for her? I am the same way – this really hits home. To be honest, your last few posts have really hit home. xo

  5. 5
    may says:

    Today I am going to accept that my three month old will refuse to sleep, and that it’s not my fault. Hopefully that will spare Future Me some grief and dark under-eye circles. At some point, I’m also going to pour Future Me a nice cocktail.

  6. 6
    Helen Jane says:

    Amanda, I KNOW, right?
    I have to TRICK myself into being kind to myself?

    With fitness, I’ve gone from external to internal motivation. So here, I’m working on going from “pretend other-lady” to “ME.” My particular brand of self-awareness seems to require all kinds of hacks to get going.

    Ha! May, Future Me prefers me to pre-mix the cocktail and then store it in the fridge for that perfect moment. As my eleven-month old still refuses to sleep, I’m clinking my imaginary pre-mixed dirty martini against yours.

  7. 7
    Sara says:

    I think the best part is that once we get in to the habit of being nice to our future selves, it becomes easier to do it. You just have to begin.

  8. 8
    JenB says:

    This is wonderful. I sometimes imagined being kinder and gentler to my younger self. Your idea seems mire fruitful. But hard. Wow, easy to ponder, but as I think about it, it will be difficult, but I’m certain it will be worth it.

    You are amazing.

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